Friday, October 31, 2008
Honey - Hello..Good Morning!
Caller - Hello (Husky voice)..the other day you told me the shipment
are coming this Friday from Penang, so where's my stock?
Honey - huh..
Caller - How come not arrived yet and..(he goes bla bla bla...)
Honey - (Diam-diam ja..nanti kau...sa sakat!)
Caller - alo..alo..
Honey - Which stock you are talking about?
Caller - The one from Penang one...why so late ooo...
Honey - Still haven't arrived yet ka?
Caller - Yes wo...so long I wait aaa...
Honey - (trying not to laugh....) Which number you dialled?
Called - Is this .......?
Honey - You got the wrong number..
Caller - Erkkk...sorry..(hang-up)
Aiya...this type of people also got meh..? giving me no chance to explain...
should just hang up but he sounds so desperate..huhuhu...next time
I'll say.."This is Cambodian Embassy"..hik hik
Thursday, October 30, 2008
1. Put the logo in your blog.
2. Add a link to the person who shared it with you.
3. Nominate at least 7 other blogs and leave a note for your nominee on their blog.
(It seems that many bloggers has been link with this campaign to date..
presently, I can only think of two nominees
- Salma (http://hosujamlas.blogspot.com/)
- Nika (http://liidan.blogspot.com/)
4. Add links to these blogs on your blog:- 1. Fara, 2. massy 3. N.O.Y
4. Bandagedknee's: Sink Into My Darkness [The Coffin Talk]
5. Honey 6. -YOUR BLOG HERE-
A salute to all who supports this campaign! BRAVO!
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 am for an early morning business flight.
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, 'Please wake me at 5:00 am ' He left it where he knew she would find it.
The next morning the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, 'It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.'
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules:
'I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?'
His new bride said, 'No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night ....whether you're here or not.'
(DAMN SHE'S GOOD!)
Marriage - Part II
Husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary!
The husband yells, 'When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads:'Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever '
'Yeah?' she replies. 'When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads:'Here Lies My Husband - Stiff At Last'
(HE ASKED FOR IT!)
Monday, October 20, 2008
Saturday, October 18, 2008
In the picture, just look at their condition.. no place to sleep,
still they have made some space for d cat n d dog... water pouring
from the roof but still each 1 of them have a peaceful smile on
their face.. Simply amazing!!!!!
The happiest people in the world are not those who have no problems,
but those who learn to live with things that are less than perfect.
Keep Smiling Always.
Friday, October 17, 2008
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0
and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance,
particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated
flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable
programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5,
and then installed undesirable programs such as NBA 5.0,
NFL 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1.
Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6
simply crashes the system. Please note that I have tried running
Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
What can I do?
First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment
Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.
Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html and
try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install
the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed,
Husband1.0 should then automatically run the applications
Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. However, remember, overuse
of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to
Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1.
Please note that Beer 6. 1 is a very bad program that will
download the Farting and Snoring Loudly Beta.
Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install
Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background
that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)
In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the
Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications
and will crash Husband 1.0. In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great
program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new
applications quickly. You might consider buying additional
software to improve memory and performance. We recommend:
Cooking 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.
Good Luck Babe!
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
1 First Important Lesson - Cleaning Lady.
During my second month of college, our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions until I read the last one:
'What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?'
Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name?
I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank. Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade.
'Absolutely,' said the professor. 'In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say 'hello.'
I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy.
2. Second Important Lesson - Pickup in the Rain
One night, at 11:30p.m., an older African American woman was standing on the side of an Alabama highway trying to endure a lashing rainstorm. Her car had broken down and she desperately needed a ride.Soaking wet, she decided to flag down the next car.A young white man stopped to help her, generally unheard of in those conflict-filled 60s. The man took her to safety, helped her get assistance and put her into a taxicab.
She seemed to be in a big hurry, but wrote down his address and thanked him. Seven days went by and a knock came on the man's door. To his surprise, a giant console color TV was delivered to his home. A special note was attached.
It read:'Thank you so much for assisting me on the highway the other night. The rain drenched not only my clothes, but also my spirits. Then you came along. Because of you, I was able to make it to my dying husband's bedside just before he passed away...God bless you for helping me and unselfishly serving others.'
Sincerely, Mrs. Nat King Cole.
3 Third Important Lesson - Always remember those who serve.
In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less, a 10-year-old boy entered a hotel coffee shop and sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of him.
'How much is an ice cream sundae?' he asked.
'Fifty cents,' replied the waitress.
The little boy pulled is hand out of his pocket and studied the coins in it.
'Well, how much is a plain dish of ice cream?' heinquired.
By now more people were waiting for a table and the waitress was growing impatient.
'Thirty-five cents,' she brusquely replied.
The little boy again counted his coins.
'I'll have the plain ice cream,' he said.
The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table and walked away. The boy finished the ice cream, paid the cashier and left. When the waitress came back, she began to cry as she wiped down the table. There, placed neatly beside the empty dish, were two nickels and five pennies..
You see, he couldn't have the sundae, because he had to have enough left to leave her a tip.
4 Fourth Important Lesson. - The obstacle in Our Path.
In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock. Some of the King's wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked around it. Many loudly blamed the King for not keeping the roads clear, but none did anything about getting the stone out of the way.
Then a peasant came along carrying a load of vegetables. Upon approaching the boulder, the peasant laid down his burden and tried to move the stone to the side of the road. After much pushing and straining, he finally succeeded. After the peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he noticed a purse lying in the road where the boulder had been. The purse contained many gold coins and a note from the King indicating that the gold was for the person who removed the boulder from the roadway. The peasant learned what many of us never understand!
Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve our condition.
5 - Fifth Important Lesson - Giving When it Counts...
Many years ago, when I worked as a volunteer at ahospital, I got to know a little girl named Liz who was suffering from a rare & serious disease. Her only chance of recovery appeared to be a blood transfusion from her 5-year old brother, who had miraculously survived the same disease and had developed the antibodies needed to combat the illness. The doctor explained the situation to her little brother, and asked the little boy if he would be willing to give his blood to his sister.
I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a deep breath and saying, 'Yes I'll do it if it will save her.' As the transfusion progressed, he lay in bed next to his sister and smiled, as we all did, seeing the color returning to her cheek. Then his face grew pale and his smile faded.
He looked up at the doctor and asked with a trembling voice, 'Will I start to die right away'.
Being young, the little boy had misunderstood the doctor; he thought he was going to have to give his sister all of his blood in order to save her but he had chosen to save her anyway.
Passing Beary Hug to........1) Minsulod -A Dedicated school teacher
2) Oiga - becos he lost his h/p..huhuhuhu..
3) Sweetie - she's a friend besides Tanakvagu..we were jamming at
Butod's ..before I became a blogger!
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Some years ago, on a hot summer day in south Florida, a little boy decided to go for a swim in the old swimming hole that was behind his house. In a hurry to dive into the cool water, he ran out the back door, leaving behind shoes, socks, and shirt as he went. He flew into the water, not realizing that as he swam toward the middle of the lake, an alligator was swimming toward the shore.
In the house, his mother was looking out the window. She saw the two as they got closer and closer together. In utter fear, she ran toward the water, yelling to her son as loudly as she could. Hearing her voice, the little boy became alarmed, and made a U-turn to swim to his mother. It was too late.
Just as he reached her, the alligator reached him. From the dock, the mother grabbed her little boy by the arms, just as the alligator snatched his legs. That began a very incredible tug-of-war between the two. The alligator was much stronger than the mother, but the mother was much too passionate to let go. A farmer happened to drive by, heard her screams, raced from his truck, took aim, and shot the alligator.
Remarkably, after weeks and weeks in the hospital, the little boy survived. His legs were extremely scarred by the vicious attack of the animal. On his arms,there were deep scratches where his mother's fingernails dug into his flesh;in her effort to hang on to the son she loved.
The newspaper reporter, who interviewed the boy after the trauma, asked the boy if he would show him his scars. The boy lifted his pant legs. Then, with obvious pride, he said to the reporter, 'But look at my arms. I have great scars on my arms, too. I have them because my Mom wouldn't let go.'
You and I can identify with that little boy. We have scars, too. No, not from an alligator, but the scars of a painful past. Some of those scars are unsightly, and have caused us deep regret. But, some wounds, my friend, are because God has refused to let go.
In the midst of your struggle, He's been right there, holding on to you. . That is when the tug-of-war begins. If you have the scars of His love on your arms, be very, very grateful. He will not ever let you go.
God has blessed you, so that you can be a blessing to others. You just never know where a person is in his/her life, and what they are going through. Never judge other persons scars, because you don't know how they got them.
Right now, someone needs to know that God loves them, and you love them too ~enough to not let them go!!! God bless you!
This poem is specially dedicated to you..
It is in this valley,
in the alone
that we find ourselves
in the best of company...
this is the place where
God fills all the empty spaces
for HE has finally been
given the room to do
what HE does best
-by Michelle McKinney Hammond
Sunday, October 12, 2008
( http://kupiokawkaw.blogspot.com/ )
2. Your relationship with him/her ? He's a friend.
3. Your 5 impressions of him/her? I don't know much about him,
but one thing for sure, he's very helpful. He asked me to try
on some new widgets..but I'm not so expert in PC thingy.
"Greg, I'm worst than you" SobSobSob...
4. Most memorable thing she/he had done for you? refer above (3)
5. Most memorable thing she/he had said to you? "minum kupi"...
6. If she/he becomes your lover you will? No, he's married.
7. If she/he become your lover, thing she/he has to improve?
refer above (6)
8. If she/he becomes your enemy, you will? I make friends,
not enemy and certainly not with Greg..he's one cool of a
guy and he's very friendly. Go to his blog and check out his smile.
I don't think will make an enemy with someone who smiles
like dat. Yeeeha ...
9. If she/he becomes your enemy, the reason will be? :(
10. Most desired thing you want to do for her/him now is? read his writings
11. Your overall impression of her/him is? he's friendly..enjoyed good food.
12. How you think people around you will feel about you?
13. The characters you love of yourself are? :(
14. On the contrary, the characters you hate of yourself are? :(
15. Most ideal person you want to be is? I just want to be myself
with all the imperfection package!
16. For people that care and like you, say something to them.
" Thanks for visiting my blog and thanks for being a friend to me..
Continue to write...and ROCK!!"
17. Pass this quiz to 10 persons that you wished to know how
they feel about you.
1. Kuai 2. Oiga 3. Andrik 4. Reno 5. Tanakvagu 6. Beck 7. Minsulod
8. San-piasau 9. Ryuzaki-'I'kid 10. Shalom
18. Who is No.6 having relationship with? I don't know..is she having one now?
19. Is No.9 a male or female? No.9 is a young chap.
20. If No.7 and 10 are together, will it be a good thing? Hehehe..I don't know.
21. What is No.2 studying about? He's working.
22. When was the last time you had a chat with No.3? We never chat,
just a few pantuns and a drop of line in his shoutbox..
that's it..But he's good at pantun eh..
23. What kind of music band does No.8 like? Hahaha...this guy?
I think he likes oldies...
24. Does No.1 have any siblings? yes....eer..guess so...does she?
25. Will you woo No.3? I will woo him for pantun only arr...
tia siokk berpantun sorang.
(Hik hik hik - wicked!)
26. How about No.9? He's a friend and 1 of my top commentators..thanks Ryu
27. Is No.4 single? He's already married, blessed with two beautiful children.
28. What is the surname of No.5? i don't know..aikk..how come
I don't know.. Aiyaa..got to call him and asked him about this.
..(he's like a brother to me..)
29. What's the hobby of No.10? I don't know..sorry.
30. Does No.5 and 9 get along well? They don't know each other. Not yet.
31. Where is No.2 studying at? He's working
32. Talk something casually about No.1? She likes photography..not much..
and she promotes 'BBKK' acronym..(sorry, I m still the new kid on the 'blog')
33. Have you tried developing feelings for No.6? with BECK???
(should I change the position of all the names I passed the quiz...
well, honestly speaking, I don't mind, if it's Brad Pitt!
34. Where does No.9 live at? Planet - Earth
35. What color does No.4 like? Colors of Love
36. Are No.5 and 1 best friend? Not yet..I don't know..
37. Is No.7 the sexiest person in the world? Women are sexy ehh!
38. What is No.6 doing now? She blogs.
This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years. The only friction in their marriage was the husband's habit of farting loudly every morning when he awoke..
The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air. So, every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her sick. he told her he couldn't stop it and that is was perfectly natural.
She told him to see a doctor, she was concerned that one day he would blow his guts out. The years went by and he continued to rip them out. Then one Christmas morning as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the innards and neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts and a malicious thought came to her. She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep and gently pulling the bed covers back, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts.
Some time later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bath room. The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing. Tears in her eyes!
After years of torture, she reckoned she had got him back pretty good. About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his bloodstained underpants with a look of horror on his face. She bit her lip as she asked him what the matter was.
He said, "Honey, you were right..all these years you have warned me and I didn't listen to you"
"What do you mean?" asked his wife.
"Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out, and today it finally happened..but by the grace of God, some vaseline and two fingers, I think I got most of them back in!!!!!
Friday, October 10, 2008
I was walking through the supermarket to pick up a few things when I noticed an old lady following me around. Thinking nothing of it, I ignored her and continued on. Finally I went to the checkout line, but she got in front of me.
"Pardon me," she said, "I'm sorry if my staring at you has made you feel uncomfortable. It's just that you look just like my son, who just died recently."
"I'm very sorry," I said to her, "Is there anything I can do for you?"
"Yes," she said, "As I'm leaving, can you say 'Good bye, Mom?' It would make me feel so much better."
"Sure," I said.
An odd request, but no harm would come of it. As the old woman was leaving, I called out, "Good Bye, Mom!" As I stepped up to the checkout counter, I saw that my total was $1027.50. "How can that be?" I asked, "I only purchased a few things!" "Your mother said that you would pay for her," said the clerk.
Thursday, October 9, 2008
The day you find that I have become very old, try to have same patience with me and try to understand me.
If I get dirty while eating...If I have some difficulty dressing...be patient! Remember the hours that I spent teaching you those things when you were small.
If I repeat the same thing dozens of time, do not interupt me! Listen to me!
When you were small, you kept asking me to read the same story, evening after evening, until you feel asleep. And I did it happily.
If I do not wash myself so often under the shower, do not reprimand and do not tell me that it is a shame. Remember how many excuses I had to invent to make you take a bath when you were small.
I taught you so many things..to eat well...to dress well..to behave well...how to confront the problems of the life.
If I sometimes lose memory or am not able to follow a conversation, give me the necessary time to recollect and if I do not get there, do not become nervous and arrogant person because the most important thing for me is to be with you and to be able to speak to you.
If I refuse to eat, do not force me! I know very well when I am hungry and when I am not hungry.
When my poor legs will not allow me to move as before, help me in the same way as when I held your hands to teach you take your first steps.
And when one day I shall say to you that I do not want to live anymore...that I want to die, do not get angry because one day you will understands.
Try to understand that certain age, we do not really live anymore. we simply survive.
One day, you will understand that in spite of all my errors, I always wanted what is best for you.
You do not have to feel sad, unfortunate or incompetent infront of my old age and of my state. You have to stay near me, try to understand what I live for.
Help me walk, help me to end my life with love and patience. The only thing that I need from you is a smile and a lot of love.
I love you my son, my daughter...
Your Dad, Your Mom
(Honeybzz says - I don't know who is the author of this letter..it comes in a form of slide which I received from my mails. I find it very touching, and would like to share with all of you)
Monday, October 6, 2008
And some say:Wife is like TV, Girlfriend is like Handphone (HP)
At home watch TV, Go out bring HP.
No money, sell TV. Got money change HP.
Sometimes enjoy TV but most of the time play with HP.
TV free for life but HP, if you don't pay, the services will be terminated.
TV is big, bulky and most of the time old but HP is cute, slim, curvy and
very portable at any time.
Operational cost for TV is often acceptable but for HP is high and often demanding.
Most Important, TV got remote but HP don't have.
Last but not least.......TV do not have virus but HP have VIRUS......Once get it,
HABIS LAH.So better choose TV lah...
(Honeybuzz says..Hehehehe..yalah..get virus..buy one free one promo arr..huhuhu)
Sunday, October 5, 2008
My my my....this cookbook was first printed in Chicago, 1943...and reprinted again in 1971.
This is so heartwarming....check this out!
A LOVE CAKE FOR MOTHER
1 can of "Obedience"
several pounds of "Affections"
1 pint of "Neatness"
Some Holiday, Birthday, and everyday "Surprises"
1 Can of "Running Errands" (willing brand)
1 Box of powdered "Get up ahen I should"
1 Bottle of "keep sunny all day long"
1 can of pure "thoughtfullness"
Mix well, bake in a hearty, warm oven, and serve to "Mother" everyday. She ought to have it in Big Slices
Written by Jean Beadle
Age 14 years
....and would like to share with you this recipe - PUMPKIN PIE
1 cup pumpkin
1 cup sugar
1/2 teaspoon of salt
1 egg, well beaten, add
1 cup of milk
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon ginger
Mix together ingredients, and taste for proper flavour before pouring into unbaked pie shell. Sprinkle nutmeg over top. Bake in moderate oven.