Dear Tech Support

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0
and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance,
particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated
flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable
programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5,
and then installed undesirable programs such as NBA 5.0,
NFL 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1.

Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6
simply crashes the system. Please note that I have tried running
Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Signed,
Desperate

DEAR DESPERATE,

First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment
Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.

Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html and
try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install
the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed,
Husband1.0 should then automatically run the applications
Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. However, remember, overuse
of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to
Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1.

Please note that Beer 6. 1 is a very bad program that will
download the Farting and Snoring Loudly Beta.
Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install
Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background
that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)

In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the
Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications
and will crash Husband 1.0. In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great
program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new
applications quickly. You might consider buying additional
software to improve memory and performance. We recommend:
Cooking 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck Babe!

Tech Support